A Wink and A Smile
by Naithom
Summary: Three of Star Fleet's finest once again join forces to defeat a Klingon invasion. Just not the three you're used to.


I own nothing but a twisted imagination

A Wink and A Smile

The past eight hours had been harrowing for Tao Li Tomasweski, the superintendent of the K-7 Starbase. Normally a quiet, unassuming repair station on the outskirts of the Federation, the worst it usually saw was a bar fight among the farmers from Sherman's Planet or an occasional tribble outbreak. But, now, in one shift, he'd had to deal with the stress of a major band concert followed quickly by the knowledge that Klingons had come across the border and attempted to steal the most famous starship in the Federation while it was in his control. He seriously needed a drink. Hell, he needed the whole bottle.

But first, he, the senior staff of the Enterprise and the crew of the Tudor, the Federation ship that was there bringing supplies and his own senior staff, needed to debrief the three officers who had single-handedly saved the Enterprise and the station.

Each of the three sat across from the officials as they were interviewed separately, and, while professional, it was obvious that all three were a bit nervous as they weren't used to being in this situation.

"Lt. Chapel, we'd like to hear your version of the events of the eight hours in question."

"Well, sir, we arrived twelve hours ago for repairs after being attacked by Megarite raiders. The crew was instructed to utilize Starbase housing during repairs because of the damage. Morale had been low of late, so many of the crew were grateful for the down-time and the knowledge that after the repairs, we had been granted leave on Risa. People saw it as a double leave since all but a skeleton crew would be staying on K-7 while the retrofitting and repairs were handled.

I had planned to meet Lt. Uhura and Yeoman Rand in preparation to stay on the Starbase where we had a busy evening planned. We were going to meet up with Yeoman Rand's family for a birthday party and then Lt. Uhura had been able to arrange through a friend for us to get tickets to see the concert by Rondo Eller. Prior to meeting them, I stopped to check on a long-term research project.

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"Christine Gael Chapel, this is shore leave security! Come out of that lab with your hands up! You are not spending the entirety of this dry dock in the research lab!"

Nyoka Uhura's elaborately wrapped headdress adorned the face that peaked into the small work-room.

But she saw no sign of the "criminal" she had come to take into custody.

"Chris?"

Suddenly the lovely blonde stuck her head out from under the work bench.

"I'm sorry, Ny, I would have been done over an hour ago but there's a short that's driving me nuts and I can't seem to get it fixed. Of all the times for this to blow and I can't move the testing at this stage. Damn, damn, damn."

Uhura calmly took off her headdress, placed it on the table, and crawled under to help.

"Ny, your outfit!"

"The outfit will be fine but if we don't meet Janice in time to meet her family before the concert, it won't be my dress that will be ruined."

For ten minutes the women worked hurriedly on the circuitry, eventually fixing the problem. But as Uhura started to move herself out from under the fixture, she began to feel dizzy.

"Chris…"

Her friend's eyes were wide with panic. "Ny…" And suddenly, the world went dark for both of them.

"When I woke up my first thought was that there had been some sort of leak, but Christine, um, Lt. Chapel assured me that she had not been working on any projects which would give off noxious fumes," Uhura explained. "It was then we heard the footsteps. And just from the sound of them, we both knew the person wasn't Federation."

"What do you mean, Lieutenant? "

"Sir, I make my living by knowing sounds and the person coming towards us weighed more than a Starfleet officer and the boots were heavier. Our suspicions were confirmed when we heard them speak. We knew we'd been boarded."

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"Mahtav, there's no one here. We have them all." The voice put a shiver in both women as the accent was definitely Klingon.

"Excellent. Get back to the shuttle bay and help with the prisoners. Roq and Kor are manning the helm and weapons," the deep voice chuckled menacingly. "Bringing back a Starship and new slave labor for the dilithium mines should go a long way to returning me to my place in the House of Q'ohn. Maybe even secure enough to get close enough to that petaQ Gravad to put a qutluch in his back and take his woman."

"How much time do we have?"

"The station knows nothing. Voram's keeping check on the communications. If we time this right, they won't have the chance to figure it out."

With that the heavy boots turned around and left the doorway. Both women held their breath until long after they could no longer hear the footfalls.

"How'd they get in?"

"Don't know, but we can't contact anyone on the station or they'll use the Enterprise's weapons on them."

Christine took a deep breath. "Then I guess it's up to us."

Suddenly a voice came from the ventilation grate in the far corner of the room.

"Do I get an invitation to the party?"

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"I was getting ready for my grandmother's birthday party. I hadn't thought I would be able to attend when it was going to be on Sherman's but when I heard where we were dry docking, I contacted the family and my uncle suggested that they use the banquet hall on K-7." The blonde yeoman explained. "Anyway, the Klingons entered the quarters that share my bathroom and I heard them discuss their plans. They mentioned they had the crew in shuttle bay 3. I crawled into the ventilation shaft and hid there, then used the vents and Jefferies tubes to make it to the bay. When I saw that Lieutenants Chapel and Uhura were not there, I headed back through the system to the science lab."

"Janice?!"

The grate fell away and the blonde lowered herself down from the ceiling.

"From what I can tell, there are five of them. They put some sort of knockout gas in the ventilation system. Apparently, it's useless in water because it didn't affect me while I was in the shower."

Uhura laughed. "Only Janice Rand could be saved by staying forever in the shower."

"You try getting the soap out of this much hair! And then it has to be conditioned. I didn't even have time to dry and weave it."

Christine placed her hand on her friend's shoulder. "That's OK, Rapunzel, just glad you're here to help. Now how do we get the rest of the crew loose and stop these guys."

Uhura channeled everything she had learned about combat from being on the bridge and dealing with four brothers. "Let's lay out what we know, locations, strengths and weaknesses.

"Two on the bridge and three in shuttle bay 3," Janice offered.

"They have control over helm, weapons and communications," included Uhura.

"And they have hostages. How many?"

Rand thought for a moment. "About twenty-five. Spock, Scotty and a combination of our folks and engineers from the base. It looks as though several of them had put up a fight either before or after they passed out. Luckily, it never occurred to them to check the air vents. I climbed through the vents and Jefferies tubes figuring you'd either be here or in your room getting ready. "

Uhura laughed. "Your knees must be killing you."

Janice winced and chuckled as she glanced towards her legs and then suddenly exclaimed. Christine turned to grab her medical tricorder assuming she was in pain when she heard her friend wail, "These were brand new pants! They're ruined!"

Indeed, the knees of the pants were covered in grime and blood. As Christine quickly repaired the wounds, the three discussed how to proceed.

"The Klingons outnumber us, are bigger and they have hostages," said Uhura, "but we know the layout, they don't know we're here and we're smaller and faster."

At that statement, Christine smiled a smile that the two rarely saw but always appreciated. It was a smile that said the usual staid and proper nurse had a seriously devious idea.

"Faster…I know a way we can be MUCH faster."

The women travelled through the vents to reach the storage bay where the prisoners were being held. From their vantage point it was obvious that several of the crew members and station staff had been beaten and/or abused. It took everything Christine had to stay quiet and not react to the bleeding and bruised individuals.

The leader, Mahtav, appeared to be quite proud of himself as he strutted around the containment field surrounding the prisoners.

"Vulcan, it should be interesting to see whether the Klingon command ransoms you back to your people after torturing you for information or just sells you on the Orion black market as a sex slave," he taunted. "As for the rest of you, I doubt you would bring much in ransom, so I suggest you prepare yourselves for your new occupations. We'll be leaving momentarily."

Uhura whispered to her compatriots, "We have to finalize the plan and stop them before they can start the engines and warp across the Neutral Zone. With no other constitution class starships in the area, they'd be able to outrun anyone else that even realizes there's a problem."

"I had been researching the use of Scalosian water during emergency medical procedures and had discovered a means by which the imbibers' cells weren't as subject to damage so that surgeons and EMT's could work on critical patients without exposing themselves to danger of dying if they were nicked. We decided that, given the situation, this was our best course of action," Christine explained to the officials.

One officer from the station appeared confused. "Lieutenant, it was my understanding that you were a nurse?"

Christine slightly smiled and explained, "I have degrees in nursing, exobiology, medical archaeology and endocrinology, sir."

The older man chuckled and said, "Good Lord, woman, are you sure you weren't drinking that stuff in college?"

McCoy, who had been sitting towards the back of the group attempted to stifle a laugh. Christine allowed herself to briefly lock eyes with her mentor, sharing an acknowledgement of a private joke, and say, "You wouldn't be the first to suggest that I had utilized Scalosian water in order to get a job done, sir, but, truthfully, this was the first time I had taken it."

"We decided, based on our skill sets, how we would each proceed," she continued. "I was to work on the injured, Lt. Uhura would establish the navigation necessary to send them back and translate the hailing call to the planet and Yeoman Rand would handle the rewiring for the Klingon scout ship to prepare them for their return. Once Janice gave the word, we would bring the Klingons back to their ship for their return voyage."

"Yeoman Rand, what were your plans for the Klingon scout ship?" asked Superintendent Tomaswecki.

Janice's eyes shown like a little girl sharing details of a wondrous prank. "First, I rigged the navigation so that once we set the coordinates, they couldn't be altered. Anyone trying would receive a phaser burst that would knock them on their….would incapacitate them temporarily. Then I made some adaptations to the clothing synthesizers so that they acted as a food replicator and set up their captain's view screen with some…entertainment. Then I set a level 7 force field around the captain's bathroom…"

Superintendent Tomaswecki interrupted, "Why the bathroom? Why a food replicator? Entertainment? And, I thought you were a yeoman? Were you attached to Engineering?"

"Oh, I'm just a yeoman, sir. I learned basic engineering helping my grandfather with his diner on K-7. Fixing the replicators, handling modifications if a new species came in, and if a fight from O'Shaughnessy's spilled out, setting up a force field. Worked the register since I was big enough to stand on a chair and work the scanner but I didn't go to school for it or anything."

An official in the back of the group looked at her more closely, then smiled in recognition. "You're Festus's granddaughter? Jacob's oldest? Well, I'll be! Janny, isn't it? I haven't seen you since you were a little bit! Didn't recognize you without that bowl haircut Jacob gave all you kids."

Janice was almost able to hide the grimace of knowing that someone remembered that her father, after her mother's death, only knew one way to cut hair and didn't see any reason to change just because one happened to be a girl. She smiled at the older man. "Altairian sandwich with mustard and pickles and a side order of gladst, extra sauce – how are you, Mr. Corry?"

She then continued, "The bathroom was an enclosed area on the shuttle with no access to weaponry, no wiring that could connect to navigation easily, a synthesizer that could be modified and it was small enough I could place a larger force field around it utilizing less power. By controlling that I could more easily prevent them attempting an overload to get out. Not much different from locking my brothers in the storage locker for time out. After I had that done, I let Christine and Ny know to bring them down when they were done with what they were doing."

*************************************************************************************

"Apparently, after folks started waking up, the raiding crew had beaten them pretty badly. There was everything from cuts and abrasions to broken bones and a few with internal injuries from being kicked while they were on the ground. Most of these were Enterprise officers. Utilizing the water, I was able to cut the force field and spend the necessary time on each patient getting them stabilized without the Klingons even knowing what was happening," Christine explained.

While she remained outwardly professional, she remembered the rage she felt seeing the unnecessary carnage and her fear when she realized that Spock was not with the immediate group. Because of the severity of the others' wounds, she went ahead and cared for the crew first, safe in the knowledge that, for once, time was on her side. She found him in the midst of being beaten by two of the three raiders. One held the Vulcan while the other was in the process of kicking him. Christine released him from the hold and moved him away from the area.

Two cracked ribs, a broken cheek bone with a laceration, plus numerous bruises. She worked silently, for once allowing herself the luxury to have her tears run hot down her face, knowing that no one would or could see. "Sons of bitches didn't have to do this to any of you. I know this hurts but it won't for long. And don't worry about the crew or the ship, Spock. When we get through with these guys, they won't want to even look towards Federation space again!" As she finished the repairs on his cheek and did a scan to check the work, she cradled his newly healed face and gently kissed his lips. "If you only knew what we have in store for them. But, better that you don't, my love. Plausible deniability is a wonderful thing." And with that she gathered her gear, got the anti-grav unit from the other side of the shuttle bay and started loading the Klingons.

*************************************************************************************

"It didn't take long to make sure the message we were sending to Gravad was just what we wanted and that the vid we included worked correctly," Uhura continued. "We wanted to make sure that we got the point across perfectly. After that, I made sure that our navigation, weapons and life support were correctly set again before I got the anti-grav and loaded up the Klingons and met with the others."

"Exactly what was the nature of the message and video, Lieutenant?" Kirk asked.

"Sir, the message to Gravad was, and I quote, 'To Gravad of the noble House of Q'ohn, we return these pathetic excuses for thieves to you to do with as you will. They are not warriors. They certainly have no skill in combat as they were defeated by a nurse, a clerk and a communications operator. The Federation does not wish to sully its prisons with their presence. We include with this refuse a video of the leader of the group for the honorable Gravad to examine so that he might be forewarned of the dishonor of these who defile the term Klingon. We have no doubt that he will, in his wisdom, know how to deal with the situation properly.' The vid was of the leader admitting that he planned on betraying Gravad the minute he got a chance. By sending them back humiliated and suggesting they were beaten by non-warriors, it makes the Klingons think twice about our training and skill and by making Gravad aware of a plot against him, we show we are honorable and potentially gain an ally."

"Exceedingly logical, Lieutenant," congratulated Spock.

Uhura smiled. "Thank you, Mr. Spock. That means a lot. Once we had all the Klingons in their proper placement in their new containment facility, Christine set the permanent settings for their nutrition station, Janice supplied their entertainment for the voyage and we locked them in. I launched their craft from the bridge of the Enterprise. Then each of us decided to do some clean up in our separate work areas before we took the antidote and contacted the station."

McCoy chimed in a question at this point. "Given what I have already heard, I'm almost afraid to ask but what did you do to the nutrition and what was the entertainment?"

"Making sure that none of the foods would be toxic to the passengers, I chose a menu of tofu chicken, oatmeal, lentils, Brussels sprouts, asparagus, prunes and milk."

"An interesting menu, nurse. Highly nutritious if a bit gassy…especially for Klingons."

Christine's countenance was a stoic as any Vulcan's.

"Indeed, doctor? I hadn't taken that into consideration. I, merely as medical personnel on the scene, wished to make sure that their positions at the time of departure and their food rations would be appropriate for the situation."

Even McCoy's eyebrow rose on that.

"OK, I'll bite. Their positions?"

"I had to take into consideration that some of the Klingons were in active motion at the time we 'grabbed' them. Such as the Klingon who was in the process of kicking Mr. Spock. I made sure that when they didn't injure themselves on the bulkhead."

McCoy smirked. "So, what were they facing?"

With a twinkle in her eye, Christine professionally replied, "As a sign of respect, I felt it important that everyone be facing their commander."

Tomasweski was fighting to keep from bursting out in laughter. "Now let me get this straight – when Klingon raiders invaded your ship, the three of you utilized Scalosian water, rescued and tended to the wounded, reconfigured their ship into a prison barge locking them in the captain's bathroom, set them up to eat gassy foods all the way back and let the head of their house know that they are not only lousy thieves but traitors."

Uhura interjected, "You forgot the in-flight entertainment, sir! All the way back, at impulse, they'll be watching educational documentaries….on the care and feeding of tribbles.

At that point, all sense of decorum was lost as every officer and official broke out in laughter. All of course, except for Mr. Spock. But that said, there did appear to be the faintest tilt of a smile on his full lips.

The Superintendent turned to Kirk and chortled, "Well, one thing's for sure – the Klingons will be taught that the females in Starfleet are even more dangerous than the males. The males will just fight you; the women will humiliate you and force you to live!

Kirk laughed and replied as he gazed with new respect at the three, "Superintendent, I think some of us in Starfleet are learning the same thing!"

From that point it was obvious that the formal aspect of the discussion was over and Tomasweski excused himself to take a message.

As Janice got up, the captain of the Tudor came over and extended his hand. "Yeoman, you do understand that your talents are seriously being wasted, correct? May I suggest something to you, something for you to consider?

Janice was polite but, at the same time, intrigued. "What's your suggestion, sir?"

"While, it's true that the Enterprise is the best in the fleet, where you are, you are a small fish in a very big pond. Berthing with a smaller ship working the outposts, you can receive faster advancement and utilize your engineering skills while obtaining distance education from Starfleet. And if you are on the right ship, such as the Tudor, you can see your family more often. Will you consider it?"

Janice practically grinned as she said, "Yes, sir, I certainly will! Thank you, sir!"

The superintendent returned to the group as the three were being congratulated by their shipmates. "Lt. Uhura, did I understand correctly that you and Nurse Chapel missed the Eller performance due to the situation."

Uhura sighed wistfully, smiled and stated, "Yes, sir, but things like that happen. Crew, first, classical music performed by good looking musicians comes second."

This was one of those times when Tao Li Tomasweski loved his job. "Well, Mr. Eller got wind of how the two of you were such great fans and why you missed the concert. You and your plus ones now have front row seats when he performs at Risa and you have been asked to join him afterwards as his guests."

Uhura and Chapel lit up like Christmas trees. Uhura turned to her commanding officer, still beaming, and asked, "Permission to excuse myself in order to squeal unprofessionally in private, sir?"

Chapel, who was receiving hugs from McCoy and Scotty, laughed at the comment and said, "With permission, I'll go with her. Harassing Klingons in hyper-time in high heels tends to tire you out."

"Permission granted, although I will need you to sign your commendations after I figure up how to write them with a straight face. And when we do meet, we need to talk about looking at how best to utilize these skill sets. Christine, did you keep tabs on the team's metabolism throughout this?"

"Of course, sir. You and Dr. McCoy will have my report on the physical reactions tomorrow morning."

"Actually, Jim, make that tomorrow afternoon," interjected Dr. McCoy, I want to run a full physical on all three of them tomorrow morning."

As the women started toward the door, Christine heard to her side, "Nurse Chapel, may I have a moment of your time?"

"Of course, Mr. Spock."

After they had moved to the side of the room, Spock started, "Your ingenuity and quick thinking under stress were highly commendable."

"Thank you, sir."

"When our mission is completed, you might want to consider utilizing those skills as well as your medical and research skills in Emergency Ops. I surmise that you would be quite an asset there."

Christine smiled brightly at both the compliment and the suggestion. The day's successes made her bold.

"Mr. Spock, do you enjoy Rondo Eller's work? I am expected to bring a plus one and it would give us a chance to discuss your idea and what steps I would need to take should I consider such a career move."

As they moved to the door, Spock opened it for her. "Indeed. Thank you. It is logical that we discuss this, among other things."

"Such as, Mr. Spock?"

"Plausible deniability." 


End file.
